Waiting, Waiting, and More Waiting

Two weeks from right now I will be at Disney/MGM Studios. I will have already had my fun on the Rock N' Roller Coaster. I will have finally ridden Star Tours. I may or may not have done Tower of Terror. I told E that I would ride with him, but if he backs out, I may back out as well. I rode it last time because the Vansome really likes it, but he'll have a big crowd to ride with him this time, so I'll be happy to sit this one out. Actually, it didn't bother me quite as much when I rode it last September. I didn't hear that "clunk" sound as the elevator settles into the bottomless shaft, right before the series of drops. The sound causes me anxiety as much as the drops themselves.
Star Tours I'm excited about, not because I've heard it's a particularly good ride, but just because I've never been able to ride it. It's a motion simulator type ride, and the guys do not do motion simulators. Our first Disney trip, I was all excited about Body Wars at EPCOT, and I stepped off the ride saying "Wow, that was fun!" Then I looked over at both guys, their faces a little green, and realized they did not have the same level of enjoyment that I had. The Vansome asked The Boy if he felt as sick as he did. Then we looked for a cool quiet place where they could get their bearings and not hurl on me. So that was the end of me riding motion simulators.

The survey guy came today to finish up. He said our numbers looked good so far, meaning cheap flood insurance. He said he would call me tomorrow, YAY! Maybe the loan will finally be taken care of when we get back from Disney.

Last night I started re-reading my Harry Potters. I asked the Vansome if he wanted me to re-read them to him so that he could jog his memory about where we are in the Potter-verse in time for the last book. He said no, he didn't really need to. I told him I was going to re-read them for my own benefit. Before the last two, I either re-read or listened to a friends audiobooks of the series thus far. It really helps me prepare. I catch things I either forgot or didn't notice the previous reads and that really makes me notice a lot more when reading the newest book, enhancing the experience. When I told the Vansome I would be reading them anyway, he decided that I might as well read them out loud. I'm happy to do it, but it does kinda mess up my plan. I will most likely not finish all 6 previous books by July 21 because it takes a lot longer reading them out loud. I can't get as many chapters done each night because my mouth gets tired and my jaws start to ache. I may read ahead on my own so that I can get through them all in time.
I do hope I don't get to Order of the Phoenix before the movie comes out. I've found that it's a bad idea to read the book right before the movie, because if it's fresh on my mind, I notice the little changes and omissions alot more and it takes away from my enjoyment of the movie. If it's been a while, then I can appreciate what does make it to the screen and not spend my time waiting for my favorite scenes from the book. OOTP is my favorite of the first 6 books. Prisoner of Azkaban was my favorite when that movie came out, and I was really bothered by how different the movie was. I am afraid of that happening with OOTP.

Happy Memorial Day

Because I haven't forgotten what Memorial Day means, I would like to express my gratitude to those who serve our country and their families. I do appreciate the sacrifices these families make every day for my freedom. I may whine about our country on occasion, but I am proud to be an American. I know that it is through the blood of others that I am able to say that. So thank you.

Counting Down to the BFDT

Two weeks from right now I will be sitting in the sugar white sand watching the waves come in. Actually, I'll probably still be at the outlet mall shopping, but when I'm finished, we'll drive over to the beach and then I'll be sitting in the sugar white sand, watching the waves come in. I'll be all peaceful and relaxed, preparing myself mentally for the hectic excitement of Disney. I really do prefer to stop at Destin on the way down. On the way back, I'm just ready to go home. I still haven't totally ruled out retiring there. Celebration might be back on my list, too. I doubt we'll have time to drive through Celebration this trip. I'd rather spend as much time as possible in the parks before we leave. Once we're on the road again, I'll be in a hurry to get to Punta Gorda and we won't want to make any side trips. Not that Celebration is really a side trip, but it would cause it to take longer to get to PG.

I hope I have my meds straightened out by then. I realized yesterday that I was definately not on Seroquel during my drug study. I took my first real Seroquel Wednesday night and I was completely useless yesterday. I slept on and off all day, and when I was awake, I was barely lucid. My scrip is for one pill three times a day, but I only took one yesterday, around lunch. I slept well last night. I'm going to try taking one before bed each night for a while. If I don't have it worked out soon, I'll just get a scrip for something I know will work and just deal with the side effects for a week. I can't be at Disney with an out of control anxiety disorder.

The undesired side effect of Lexapro, which I now know is what I had for the study, has always been massive weight gain for me. I've taken it three times in the past, four including this study, and I've gained 10-15 pounds each time. I have finally reached the point where my clothes are uncomfortable, so I really need to do something before the BFDT. I decided today to do a little Atkins-low carb dieting for the next 2 weeks. I know it doesn't work long term, but I just need to get comfortable again and Atkins is the fastest way I know of to drop a few pounds. Even 5 would be helpful. I've also got to get serious about walking every day. I've lost even the stamina I had for our last trip.

Look What Came in My Mail Today

I am so excited! I originally told the Vansome not to worry about getting me a Mother's Day present, but I changed my mind this weekend when I realized I wanted a new camera for the BFDT (Big Family Disney Trip). So it's a little late, but calling it a Mother's Day gift takes away the guilt. We got it from Tiger Direct. It's a refurbished model so the box looks a little rough, but we saved big, which further alleviates guilt. I played with it while I still had E this morning, but I didn't sit down and read the manual until after lunch.

We ate lunch at The Boy's pizza place. A and I had sandwiches and E had his favorite: cheese pizza with no sauce. He told me on the way over, "I don't love sauce." The Boy said he was pleasantly surprised. He said it was "nice" to see us there. I was seriously impressed with the wheat bread on my sandwich. It was very dark, very soft, and quite tasty even apart from the meat, cheese, and creamy italian dressing.

I have 5 hours to keep myself occupied until the season finale of Lost. I've been avoiding Two Peas because apparantly there are some spoilers floating around and I don't trust some troll to not put something in the subject line. I find myself drawn to spoilers when I'm really excited about a show, but I usually regret finding out ahead of time. I like being surprised. One of the things I like about Lost is the twists and turns and secrets and surprises. It really lessens the experience if I know things beforehand. I think that's why I didn't enjoy last week's episode as much as I should have. I thought something was going to happen based on partial spoiler info, and I waited and waited, but I was wrong, or my spoiler was wrong. I don't want to spend tonight's show waiting for specific events that I know are going to occur. I want to be in the moment. And I want to surprised, and maybe even shocked. Those are the episodes I like best. I like to be saying"Whoa" when the credits roll.

I have no qualms about taping the last hour of idol tonight. It overlaps with Lost from 8-9. I probably won't even watch it until tomorrow. I'm sure I'll still be reeling from Lost. Besides, it's not like there's any question that Jordin's winning now. That song last night, oh my. Why oh why can they not find decent songs for their first single? Honestly, even if I had strongly wanted Blake to win, which I didn't, I wouldn't want him to win now just because it would be horrendous for him to have to put that song on his album. I'll watch the first hour just to keep me occupied until 8, and hopefully neither of them will sing that song until after I start taping.


I'm taking generic Zantac again. I'm starting with one a day. When I'm taking two a day and still drinking Mylanta straight from the bottle, then I'll make an appointment with my doctor. That should give me until after the BFDT. Or it may be next week. I'm starting back on the Seroquel tonight after my shows. I had nightmares all night last night after having a mild panic attack before falling asleep. It's time.

Babysat the J-man this morning. As is his style, he was pleasant and happy the whole time. After Grammy returned, we went to the Farmer's Market. I got another cantaloupe from the Carpenter's because the one I bought from them last week was so sweet and good. I also bought some kale and a little baggie of sweet peas for the Vansome. I skipped out on the okra. I attempted fried okra last night, the good kind, pan fried with cornmeal. But as usual, I suck at it. I just can't make it taste like my mom's, no matter what I do. It wasn't bad, and I still ate it like popcorn, but just not quite as good. This time I used too much cornmeal, that was at least part of the problem.

I suffered through the end of 24 last night. It was watchable, but just barely. I did appreciate that Audrey didn't wake up at the end. I was sure she was going to open her eyes and be all recovered (just by the sound of Jack's voice) and they would go off into the sunset. I was also pleased that they didn't do the whole Jack is Josh's father that I was afraid they would do. I really didn't want Jack to have cheated on Terri more than just that time with Nina. See, the problem with this season is in what I just wrote. It sounds like I'm talking about a soap opera. Next year, oh please oh please, it will be better.

The Vansome is recovering nicely. He feels like he's got something in his right eye, the one they had trouble with, but other than that, he's feeling good. He's ecstatic over being able to see. He may need reading glasses. We'll know for sure in a couple of weeks.
My esophagus is also recovering, but much more slowly. I still have heartburn almost every night, and occasionally during the day, but it's not as bad. The counselor at my drug study scared me last week when I talked to him about it. He said he had the same problem and ignored it like I've been doing. By the time he took care of it, it was almost too late. He said that pain is good, because it lets me know I haven't killed all my nerve endings yet. Apparantly the next step after that is to wake up with a bloody pillow, or start hacking up blood during the day. Both of which are very bad signs. I think I'll go ahead and make that appointment now.

I forgot to title this one

Tonight the complete waste of time that is 24 season six finally comes to an end. I'm assuming Jack has to kill his dad in order to find out the secrets of the island, or something like that. I'm sure I'll watch, or at the very least have it on in the background while I play on the computer, which is what I did last week. I'm afraid for next season, but they've got six months to figure out where they went wrong and fix it. I have hope. Sort of.

I've been off meds for 4 days now and I'm doing okay. I know it will get bad eventually, but I've been able to control it on my own so far. Dr Nguyen prescribed me Seroquel, which is what we're pretty sure I was taking during the study. I filled the scrip when I got the Vansome's eye meds Thursday. I have them if I need them, but for the sake of the study I'm trying to stay off of them for at least the first week. I'm mostly just laying low and trying not to commit to anything beyond a couple of babysitting gigs. I have nephew J tomorrow morning and he is just about the easiest, most pleasant baby I have ever had the pleasure of being around. I'll just have him a couple of hours max and that's more fun than stressful. Same with nephew E that I'm keeping Wednesday morning. He's just fun and I enjoy hanging out with him. All day might cause me to have some problems, but all morning will actually be good for me. Both boys just make me happy.

All out of clever titles

The Vansome's surgery went well yesterday. There was a minor complication with the suction clamp on his right eye and they had to redo it, so he's had a lot more pain on that side. He had a hard time making himself rest afterwards. He took a couple of naps, but he got up and watched a couple of hours of TV with me after he ate dinner. Because I had signed off on being responsible for his care, I was telling him to go to bed at every commercial break, but he wouldn't budge. He was a really good patient when I had to put his eyedrops in for him. He actually asked me to help him with that and I appreciated him letting me take care of him. He couldn't sleep with his eyeshield on because it didn't fit his head right, so he slept in his sunglasses. I was nervous every time I felt him reach up to scratch any part of his upper body because I knew he was going to reach under his glasses in his sleep and rub his eyes. He didn't. At his follow up visit this morning, they said he was healing perfectly and his eyesight is now 20/15. He's still wearing the sunglasses all the time, and he slept a while after we got home this morning, but he's out driving now. I wasn't thrilled with that plan, but they said he was okay to drive and he's not drugged, so I couldn't really stop him. I'll be nervous until he gets back, though.

I went to Fresh Market yesterday after I left the Vansome for his surgery. It opened Wednesday and so I stopped in to check it out. It was very nice inside, and the food looked wonderful. They didn't have much in the way of bulk bins, just candy and trail mix. No spices, no beans and grains and things. But the produce did look good, and they had a good selection. No conch, but coconut shrimp and several different crab cakes. The bakery looked especially dangerous. I thought they would have a better selection of cheeses. They did have a cold pack of port wine cheese that looked much better than the prepackaged stuff we get at Kroger's. I didn't get it because I had already stocked up before the surgery. I did get a cold pack of creamy swiss with almonds and that's been my lunch the last two days. They also had mini Toblerone bars that I'd never seen before. I treated The Boy. That's his favorite candy bar.

As for my TV habit:
I guess I called Idol this week. I hate to see Melinda go. It goes without saying that she's head and shoulders above the other two. But it's ok, I'm not disappointed because I mostly expected it. We'll see if I was right about the rest next week.
Lost was a little bit of a let down. I've come to expect major revelations every week now, and I didn't get any this week. I did enjoy the story, and for that alone it will probably end up being one of my all time favorite episodes, but I was expecting something different. It was sweet to see Charlie's good memories, because his backstories are usually too painful for me to watch. I did tear up a time or two.
CSI was another mild disappointment. I love the Grissom/Sara storyline, but to be honest, I just didn't care that much when Sara was stuck under that car at the end. I was not emotionally invested and I don't know why. They played up the Big Reveal of the Gris/Sara secret relationship, but it was so subtle you could have missed it. I guess that is fitting for their relationship, though.
The Best Show of the Week Award goes to The Office. Too many LOL moments for me to even know where to start. I love that Jan just completely self-destructed, I love that Ryan is now Michael's boss, and I almost got teary with Pam when Jim said, "It's a date!" They really did such a good job of finally bringing Jim and Pam together. I am far too emotionally invested in the happiness of two people who don't even exist, but then I've been known to do that.

AI, FEMA, CDs, and LASIK

I need to revise my idol predictions. Based on last nights performance order and this mornings dial idol results, I'm afraid my Jordin is heading home. For the past 5 seasons, the contestant who sang first on top three night was the one who went home that week. There have been no exceptions. Jordin sang first, so things are not looking good for her. Dial idol's geo-predictions showed Jordin winning only 2 more states than Blake, but losing the most states. Dial idol is far from accurate, but it usually gives me a pretty good idea of the trends. I'm excited about Maroon 5 performing at the results show tonight! I haven't heard their new song yet, I'll have to download it, but I might wait until after tonight just in case it's more like the abomination that is "She Will Be Loved" and less like "Shiver" and "Harder to Breathe."

My property is being surveyed as I type. Hopefully we can get moving on our loan again. If the survey shows we don't need flood insurance I don't know what I'll do. I don't think we need flood insurance, but we have been going round and round with FEMA and their flood mapping people for so long that I'm afraid they'll insist on two more surveys or some other time consuming and expensive hoops to jump through before they will change our flood risk status. I really would rather the survey put us smack in the middle of the high risk zone so we can just get the damn insurance and get our loan. I'm so very very tired of FEMA and flood risks. I told the Vansome maybe God's trying to warn us that we're going to have a freak flood and we'll be need this flood insurance. If Marlar Engineering says we don't need flood insurance, but FEMA still says we do, I'll have a complete breakdown.

Brother C called this morning. He's making a mix CD for us to all take on the Big Family Disney Trip. He was asking what we might want to listen to, and I suggested Beastie Boys License to Ill, which I am now listening to. That CD always reminds me of him and high school. I'm looking forward to hearing what else he has on it. I'm sure he'll have me laughing the whole way. I love my big brother.

I've got a good to do list going today because tomorrow Ill be running my cars little wheels off. Tomorrow the Vansome is having LASIK done on his eyes. He's wanted to have his eyes done for as long as I've known him. He can't wear contacts and he really hates his glasses. I've had contacts since I was 12, so I don't really mind them. I would like to have the surgery, but it's pretty far down on the priority list for me. We have set aside money for the Vansome to have his done a few times in the past, but something always came up, like braces for The Boy or last years Disney trip (we hadn't been in 3 years and it was such a good deal we couldn't pass it up.) I'm really excited for him. He was almost too excited to sleep last night. He'll be bouncing off the walls tomorrow morning.
Tomorrow I also have my last major visit for the anxiety drug study. It's a very busy visit, blood draws, EKG, weight, vitals, waist measurement, seeing two different doctors, several questonaires, and a phone questionaire. I have no idea how long it will all take, but I'll probably have to leave in the middle to take the Vansome. Hopefully The Boy won't have to work late so I can get him home before I have to pick up the Vansome. He will be on major drugs initially because they want him to sleep for the first 24 hours. I may try to sleep on the couch because I would really hate to accidentally poke him in the eye. If he's really drugged, he may forget to sleep facing away from me, and I've come close to poking him in the eye more than once in the past 7 1/2 years.

Shuffling the Menu Cards

I'm not quite so depressed today. He's 18, it's happened, there's nothing left to think about. And our lives didn't change at all over the weekend. I've got peppy Jason Mraz singing about being a Geek in the Pink in the background and I'm feeling pretty good. I've got an overall up tempo playlist today. The Boy says Fall Out Boy is "emo" and therefore by definition depressing, but I'm waaaay too out of the loop to know what emo means, and the FOB songs I'm listening to are fast enough for me. Robbie Williams almost always makes me happy. He has such a huge range of song styles, and I like them all.

I've been having pretty serious heartburn problems lately, way worse than normal. Apparantly I have been abusing my esophogus and it's not happy with me. I've finally given in and I'm going to adjust my diet until I'm healed. The added bonus is that I'll probably drop a few of the pounds I've packed on lately. I've really overdone the chocolate, and I know that's a heartburn causer, so hopefully the thought of extreme pain will be enough to break that addiction. I also know that I can't really handle tomatoes in any form and of course spicy foods are out. That has really been a problem because I've had to eliminate over 75% of my recipes.
I love making menus well in advance. I have all of my recipes on 3x5 index cards with a hole in the top left corner. I have them divided into 4 sets, each held together with a ring clip. One has desserts and appetizers, one has main dishes and side dishes in my regular rotation, one has the main dishes I rarely fix because one or both of the guys don't like them or they are really complicated and usually not worth the trouble or I made them too often and we're just all tired of them. The last one has all the meals and sides for the next two weeks or more, in order, so that I can just get that down when it's time to cook dinner.
As part of my vacation planning, I went ahead and planned our menu for all the dinners until the day before we leave. When I realized I would have to change my diet for a while (read: the Vansome insisted I take care of myself before I burn a hole straight through my esophagus) I had to go through the menu and pull out the things I can't eat. It took forever last night to redo my menu plan! That's when I discovered how many of my recipes contain tomatoes in some form. I don't even like tomatoes on their own, but I cook with them almost every night. Between tomatoes and hot peppers, I don't have a lot of things left to cook. I just don't have bland, good for my tummy recipes. Tonight I'm just making spaghetti with olive oil and parm and tossing some shrimp on top. Tomorrow I'll make chicken and dumplings and we'll get two or three meals out of that. I managed to get a new menu put together to last until vaca, but it really made me sad to put so many of our favorites in the "rarely made" recipe file. I am going to make an exception for some Mother's Day chocolate that I got yesterday. That is if I can convince The Boy to tell me where he's hidden it.

The Day Before

I'm geting ready for Mother's Day today. I told The Boy all I wanted from him was for him to shave tonight instead of waiting until tomorrow morning and to not give me a hard time about getting up and going to church in the morning. He agreed to all of that and took me to lunch today. All I have left to do today is finish Grammy's present and card, make Strawberry Pretzel Salad and Pineapple Macadamia Bread for tomorrow, get all of my church stuff together and ironed, and wrap a couple of presents.

The Boy turns 18 tomorrow. I have never felt anxious about his birthday before, but this is a big deal age, and I find myself feeling little pangs of "I'm not ready." I almost feel like I did right before he was born. I feel really scared about what's coming next and I don't think I'm ready for it. I'm tearing up just thinking about 18. That's just too old for my baby. And it's bringing back all of the grief and regrets that I couldn't have any more kids. Technically it was my decision to stop with just The Boy, but it was only because by then it was too late for us to start over. Life gets in the way sometimes. I never in a million years thought I would have an only child. I never dreamed while I was pregnant with him that I would never experience that ever again. I fully expected to spend my 37th year in a full house, not an empty nest. I still daydream about children I will never have.

But God, thankfully, knows what he is doing. I know now that I wasn't really meant to have the big family I always dreamed of. I just don't have the temperament for it. I love my nieces and nephews, and I miss them when I haven't seen them for a while, but they wear me out fairly quickly. My anxiety and depression just gets harder and harder to control the older I get, and I already feel immense guilt for the ways that has effected The Boy's upbringing. My goal now is to make the most of the life I do have, and enjoy the benefits that come with it. And I am actually the most content I have ever been with my life. If I knew that things would never change for us and we would be in this state for the rest of our lives, I would be fine with that. I still look forward to the future, but I don't feel like I need for it to hurry up and happen.

My strawberries are good and thawed and The Boy needs attention, so I'm off to put food together and discuss current events and the status of the semi-missing Joe Kitty.

Okay, now my salad is mostly put together, I'm licking the cream cheese/cool whip/sugar mixture out of my mixing bowl, the semi-missing Joe Kitty has been located taking a nap with the Vansome, and I am now well informed on China, Taiwan, and the Olympic Torch route, and partially informed on Hugo Chavez and the long term effects of his leadership on Venezuela's relationship with the US. The Boy should go into politics.

TV Updates

My streaming Jack Handey changed! I guess it must change monthly, and I just haven't looked at it since April. If you haven't looked at it recently, check it out at the bottom of the page. There are some on there this time that were new to me.

Lost was amazing last night! (I won't spoil it for you, Ames, but I can't wait til you guys get this season on DVD so we can talk about it.) Idol was okay. Barry Gibb night was not the best idea they've ever had. It was time for Lakisha to go home. She needs to be back with her daughter. I could tell that's been bothering her a lot. Anything could happen now. I'm guessing a shocker Melinda elimination next week, Blake and Jordin in the finals and Jordin winning. But I wouldn't be surprised at anything.
I watched 24 the last two Mondays, after I swore I was done for this season. It's actually fun to see how bad it can get. Best line ever two weeks ago: After Lennox explains to Daniels that they have a spy who's been sleeping with Daniels' aide Lisa to get information, Daniels deadpans, "We have a bigger problem, Tom, I'm sleeping with her too." Dun Dun DUN! Straight out of a soap opera! Then the scene that had me laughing out loud this week: the bad guys break into CTU by dynamiting the sewer grate under the building. Had no one ever considered this possibility before? How secure is that place?
I have another overlap dilemma this week between CSI and The Office, darn that NBC for messing up my schedule. Last week I got it together and taped The Office. I watched the first 20 minutes, then turned on the trusty VCR and moved into the living room to watch CSI. The Office is the kind of show that you can watch in pieces like that. It's all funny, and the episodes do have a flow to them, but it's not like I'm ever on the edge of my seat, waiting for the next scene. The previews have been teasing me with a possible Jim/Pam development, so I hope they aren't faking me out and something does actually happen with those two.

Old Potatoes and Dead Bunnies, or What is That Smell?

I have a pretty serious kitchen stink I'm trying to deal with today. The Vansome has taken a lengthy break from his cabinet building project, so I'm operating on half a kitchen. The corner between the stove and sink has just been a black hole, except that all the crap in it is painfully visible. It was just the remainders of the old cabinet without a countertop, kinda like open shelving, only not useful or attractive. So it has accumulated large amounts of stuff I don't use often, and boxes of trash bags, and loose Kroger sacks.
I have been smelling a faint shrimpy smell around the sink for a couple of days, but we had shrimp last week so I just cleaned and cleaned the sink and the trash can. I cleaned both drains with baking soda and vinegar. Still a stench, but by yesterday, it had reached the level of kitty poop, so I was looking for a Beans accident now that he doesn't have an indoor litter box. Poor Beans, being falsely accused, and he really is a good boy about that sort of thing. I knew it wasn't Joe because he only pees on stuff when he's mad, and he has never pooped on our stuff. Nairobi was famous for leaving tokens of her dissatisfaction with us, but the boys don't do that.
Anyway, back to the stench in my kitchen. After doing a thorough search, the Vansome and I discovered a bag of potatoes that had somehow gotten lost in the black hole. It was so old it had liquefied, and the stench was unimaginable once it was exposed to the air. We threw out everything that it had leaked on, ripped out the rest of that cabinet, and scrubbed everything down with large amounts of Odo-Ban and Lysol. It's not helping. The smell is even stronger today and it's more than a little upsetting. I've got baking soda and vinegar on it now, and that helped for a while, but I can smell it again now. It has soaked into the concrete and I don't know how to fix that.

Shortly after the Vansome and I got married, during the first snow that winter, March Kitty left us a dead bunny at the front door, sort of a Welcome to the Family present for the Vansome. He was a little off mentally, that March Kitty, but you can't say he wasn't thoughtful. Out of gratitude for the gesture, the Vansome thought it would be nice to move the dead bunny to the garage so that March Kitty could snack on it in warmth and comfort, out of the snow. Wow, that was not smart. Probably the worst idea the man has ever had. The smell when we opened the door the next morning was unbelievable. For years later we would occasionally catch a whiff of dead bunny in the garage. Years. I can't have a stinky kitchen for years. My house is too small for that.

Feeling Draggy

As productive as I felt Saturday, I've felt completely unmotivated ever since. I made a couple of scrapbook pages Saturday with the Vansome's baby pictures, and one with pictures of The Boy and his Grammy at Bass Pro. I'll try to scan it and post it here later, but I'm not going to promise anything. I tried to scan one of the Baby Vansome ones to post on Two Peas, but my scanner kept cutting off the lighter colored edges. I don't know how to make my scanner work properly. It's always just randomly deciding to cut off portions of whatever I'm trying to scan. With small things, it ususally helps if I put something dark behind it. But seeing as how the scrapbook page takes up the whole scan area, that won't work in this instance.

I've really really not wanted to do anything this week. I was draggy Sunday and Monday because I was out of estrogen, and I've had stomach problems on top of it. My estrogen has been replenished, but I'm still felling draggy. I'm trying to drink alot to keep from dehydrating, and I don't think I've been that sick, but maybe I have. Anyway, The Boy just called, so I'll have to drag myself out to pick him up, and I promised I'd take him shopping today, so it'll be a while before I get back.

Happy Cinco de Mayo and National Scrapbooking Day!

Today I am feeling very motivated to be productive. I don't know what's gotten into me, but I'm just goning to go with it. The Boy and I have already planted two rose bushes. The Vansome stopped by some hardware store with his dad on their way back from deer camp Wednesday, and they had a bunch of rose bushes for $1 each. He bought 5. We are putting three next to the red rose we already have in the back yard, another red, a pink, and a white. The two we planted today were a Peace rose, which is kind of creamy, with pinkish edges, and another pink. We planted them in the flower bed in front of the office window, where the old azaleas were.

In honor of National Scrapbooking Day, I'm going to scrapbook today. I've got QVC on, and they have three hours of scrapbooking programs starting at 2:00. As soon as I finish here, I'm going to set up my supplies and get ready to create. I am so excited! I got some pictures from Pap last night, so I'll probably start with those.

I don't know what I'm going to do for Cinco de Mayo. I'd like to have a celebratory margarita, but the Vansome is still up fishing, and I'm too much of a lightweight to have a drink in public without someone to drive me home. I may just get some Mexican-ish snacks for dinner and Dos Equis to drink at home.

I've Got to Have Priorities

I haven't felt like blogging lately and I don't know why. It's not that there's nothing going on, that certainly hasn't stopped me before. I have been sleeping better and I've been finding things to do while The Boy is at work, so I seem to not have as much time for it. And TV has been really good lately, so that's always a priority. I guess with being out of town for the weekend and Van being gone as well, my routine is just off. I'll try to do better.

TV has been really good this week. This was probably the best week of American Idol so far. Phil did great, Lakisha finally got her groove back, Melinda proved she can rock as well as she can do everything else, Chris was only partially unlistenable. Jordin, poor thing, was pretty much totally unlistenable, but I give her a pass because 1) she knew it, 2) she's usually awesome, and 3) she's just so darn cute.

Blake was just WOW. I was definately in the 50% that loved his performance. That is probably my favorite Bon Jovi song, and I was really really nervous before he began, but I was totally blown away by him. I found video of it online the next day and made the Vansome watch within the first 10 minutes after he got home. He loved it too, as much as I did.

Something about Blake has been bugging me for a while. Certain expressions he has remind me of someone and I have not been able to put my finger on it until Tuesday. I knew it was somebody I knew in real life, not a celebrity, but other than that I was lost. Well, right before the show started, The Boy's best buddy Mikey came over to the house, the first time I've seen him in a couple of months. He smiled and there was Blake! Mystery solved! I told him, but he doesn't watch the show. I went to Idol Forums and found some pictures of Blake and he could see the resemblance.

I am very grateful to Mikey because he is responsible for The Boy's j-o-b. That is still going very well. I've been getting some free pizza out of the deal lately. They really do make some awesome pizza, or at least my boy does. Still, I'm looking forward to seeing him develop skills that will lead to a career.

I'm having a hard time deciding what to do about some show overlap tonight. I could watch The Office and tape CSI, but I don't know that I would get around to watching it later. The Vansome is not a fan of The Office, he finds it too painful to watch. The smart thing would be to tape The Office, but all the NBC shows are expanded tonight, so I'm not really sure about start and end times. In other words, I'm trying to decide if it's worth the trouble. I'm leaning towards not. Someday I'll have TIVO, then I'll really be a worthless lump of TV addiction.

Kroger has large quantities of Dark Chocolate Kissables on their clearance aisle, 85 cents for a good size bag. Of course I had to stock up. I've had The Boy hiding them, but he let me have a whole bag tonight and I'm making myself sick on them. The Vansome noticed my plight (after hearing me rattle the bag for the 50 millionth time) and has graciously removed them from my presence. That was about two sentences ago and I'm already experiencing withdrawal. I think I may have a problem.

Big D with Grammy

Sorry it's been a few days. All of my sidebars are updated now. I've been out if town, shopping and visiting realtives in Big D (little a double l a s). Grammy likes to visit her Aunt Mary every year on her birthday, and I really enjoy going with her. Aunt Mary was 98 this year. She's getting a little less reliable with family stories, but I still love to talk to her and I love spending time with Grammy's cousin Deanna. It's also neat to see Grammy interacting with her mother's realtives. I like seeing Aunt Mary because it gives me some idea of what my grandmother must have been like. And of course I love the old pictures! Some year I'm going to have a portable scanner and I'll be able to save all of Aunt Mary and Deanna's family memoribilia. What a treasure trove that will be!
We shopped and shopped and wore Deanna out. I bought more scrapbooking supplies at Deanna's favorite scrapbook store. I'm really feeling the urge to scrapbook lately. Maybe I'll get to it this week. I bough some clothes for the Disney trip (and some Disney embellishments for the scrapbook after the trip), and I got prizes for my guys. I brought The Boy several different flavors of hot tea bags from Central Market, as well as some really good trail mix. If we had a Central Market here, I would be forced to get a job. I really do love that place. I mean, whole sugar cane! Who really buys whole sugar cane? They did not have conch in their fresh seafood, but that's a good thing because I would have wanted to buy it and there really is no way we could have kept up with it and kept it cool long enough to get it home.